


Nightmares

by NorthoParthae



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Child Abuse, Crying, Happy Ending, M/M, Nightmares, Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-10-23 10:35:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10717710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NorthoParthae/pseuds/NorthoParthae
Summary: Nightmares are a dreadful thing but Bitters had it worse. Old wounds can never heal, they always get you somehow but maybe you just need someone to make it go away...





	Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a sub-plot related to my other story: Do I Know You? which can be found here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10506645/chapters/23183508
> 
> Be free to drop a comment or criticism! I'd appreciate it!

Hello? Where am I?

_You’re a failure! She died because of you!_

W-what! No! Who are you?!

_Go back crying to your mother dickhead!_

Hey! W-who said that…

_You’re a monster! I cared for you and this is what I get?!_

N-no p-please…I-I’m sorry Matthews p-please! I didn’t-!

“Haugh!” Bitters gasped loudly, holding on to his pounding chest. He looked at his hands, bloodied and dirtied. He closed his eyes firmly, letting the darkness around him comfort him, knowing he was not real, this was all fake.

_You left him._

No. No. No. He repeated. He curled up his body, cornering himself as he began to grabbed his hair, pulling it erratically, violently. His body shivered even more, feeling a cold touch run over his body.

_You knew he would die._

“You’re not real!” He tried screaming. But nothing came out. Then he saw Matthews, his body was lifeless, not moving. Blood was all over his armor as his head turned slowly, staring coldly at Bitters as his face was smeared in blood and scars, contorted to anguish and pain. Bitters saw himself in his eyes, his cold dead eyes. At first, he saw the time when he and Matthews’ met for the first time, just children, running around, then he saw them grow up together, he saw Matthews’ comforting him while he was crying, he saw Matthews beside him while they were laughing.

But. Then he saw himself running. Running away from Matthews’, running away as he was forced to watch his friend die in a slaughter. The claws dig deep into Matthews’ skin, the teeth sinking into his skull, the screams, the pleas, the horrible noises that deafened Bitters while he watch his friend in pain, shouting for help that never came, begging for mercy that never existed, screaming out Bitters’ name, hoping that he can save him.

“Why. Why didn’t you save me.” Matthews’ cried in despair. Bitters tried to speak but his voice was stuck, it was as if he can’t speak. No matter how loud he shouted, nothing would come out. He tried to struggle but he can’t move, all he can do was see was what remained of Matthews; wounds kept on appearing on his friend, bleeding out violently as Matthews shouted each second for Bitters, his shrilled voice piercing the silence.

“Why would you do this to me.” Matthews groaned, blood starting to ooze from his mouth. Bitters thrashed and flailed, trying to resist the invisible restraints but the more he tried, the worse it was for Matthews, his flesh was pierced and bruised, his screams becoming more audible as his stomach was gutted.

“Why?!” Matthews screamed at last, his body parts being torned at last. A deafening silence pierced the room. The scenes made Bitters want to vomit at the gory mess. He began to tear up, crying loudly as he screamed as loud as he can to the sky. But of course, nothing came out.

_Bitters?_

Then, a voice reached out.

_C’mon Bitters, snap out of it._

“W-who’s there?” He manage to croak, wiping off the tears with his palm. When he opened his eyes he saw Smith. He looked…tired. Bitters shook his head, glimpsing at his surroundings. There wasn’t any Matthews, there wasn’t any voices, it was just his room, like he remembered and how it usually was. Smith was dead worried, looking over to the smaller man with his hands on Bitters’ shoulders. When Bitters blinked, he sighed as he let go of Bitters, still dazed and confused, but Bitters refused, holding on to Smith with tears.

“No.” Bitters squeaked, forcing his face onto Smith’ torso. He wrapped his hands around his partner, tightly squeezing Smith to a point he produced an ‘omphf’ sound. Even more confused, Smith looked down only to see him hug tighter; at this point Bitters’ might as well suffocate him to death if Smith wasn’t bigger than him.

“Don’t. P-Please, I’m scared.” Bitters whispered when Smith tried to get away, stuttering as tears were now dropping from his chin. Smith stared down at Bitters, who was now getting his shirt wet as he rubbed his head onto Smith, trying to urge him from going away.

A part of Smith died when Bitters responded but it excited the senses of another. He wasn’t used to this new side Bitters. Ever since the incident, he’s…just not the same. Bitters was the slightly asshole-y pessimistic uncaring lieutenant in the squad but then he overturned to this scared unconfident regretful person in a flash. Smith never did know what Bitters’ troubled backstory was but he knew enough that Bitters was a troubled man, using his fake ego and attitude to cover up his troubled childhood. Smith wiped the tears off Bitters’ face, giving him a assuring smile. He wrapped his hands around Bitters and lifted him onto his lap, letting Bitters’ head rest on his shoulder as his hug tightens.

Bitters remembered all the mistakes he did, it wasn’t his fault, it was a wound that kept re-opening, torturing him as a punishment for trying to escape what he truly is; a miserable being who doesn’t deserve this. He remembered hiding his broken self because he doesn’t want to be ‘weak’ like the bullies at school said or ‘needy’ like his father repeated throughout his existence. He didn’t want any friends, he didn’t want any love, he didn’t want anything, because he knew one day, life finds a way, life finds a way to take it all back from him and leave him die alone. Leaving him depraved, begging one question his whole life: ‘What did I do wrong?’

“I’m here for you Bitters.” Smith whispered as he patted his friend’s back gently, trying to calm him down. When Bitters’ choking and cries were starting to fade; Bitters slowly let go of him, adjusting himself back on his bed. Just like that, Smith said good night and reached for the ladder to the top of their bunk bed but then he felt something tugging his shirt.

“Smith I…” Bitters muttered under his breath, looking away for a moment as his red face starts to get redder. Smith put an eyebrow up at the statement, looking down at Bitters. It was like a spark but more of a lightning bolt when it struck Smith and his face too became redder when he realized it. He caught a glimpse at the alluring orange eyes of his partner, prompting him to an uncomfortable position.

“Bitters...I…well-you’re not a kid anymore, I don’t think-” Smith looked back, watching if Palomo or Jensen were watching. Nope. They’re dead asleep. He looked back at Bitters, eyes shining and his pouting lips waiting for an answer, “Look, I know it’s tough but it’s just a dream.”

Bitters whimpered, crawling back to the back of his bed and pulling the covers up to his head. He turned around so he couldn’t face Smith and started sobbing quietly. Smith knew that what he’s going to do probably isn’t right but he couldn’t just leave the guy cry himself to sleep every night, this was at least the third time this week and frankly he’s tired of it too. He sighed, breathing deeply before he made his decision.

Bitters felt something touching him, naturally, he looked over and Smith was there holding him. In his bed, cuddling him. His hands wrapped around Bitters’ body.  Bitters leaned back more, feeling the warmth of his partner which made Smith shudder slightly, gripping onto Bitters tighter this time. Turning his head around slowly, Bitters kissed him on the cheek right then and there, grinning. Although Smith can’t see it, his face was getting redder each second but he didn’t seem to care. Soon he felt Bitters’ face gently nudging his chest, listening to his heartbeat, only to realize he giggled quietly as he felt it go faster. The pair went into slumber blissfully with Bitters knowing that he was safe at last, in the arms of someone he’d never expect to hold him.


End file.
